These bits of bedroom advice are from Desireé Dallagiacomo and Kaycee Filson’s poem, “Real Sex Tips,” performed at the summer 2014 National Poetry Slam.
“The most important choice I ever made, the one that’s had the greatest impact on my life, was joining the Navy after high school. I grew up in a small town. My family never took vacations. They worked six days a week and went to church on the seventh.
“The moment I joined the Navy in Indianapolis, they asked me, ‘Do you want to go to the Great Lakes in Chicago, or do you want to go to San Diego?’
“I said, ‘San Diego, by all means.’
”Then, in the military, I travelled to Hong Kong, Japan, and the Philippines. That introduced me to different cultures, expanded me, and opened my horizons. As a consequence, I now get along with everybody. I’ve dated a Black woman, an Afghan woman, and a Filipina.
“If I had stayed in my small town, I wouldn’t be the way I am today. Where I grew up, right here in White County, the people were all Caucasians— not a single minority in the whole county. Black people were not allowed to stay at a hotel. The nearest places you could see minorities were Lafayette—a few black students at Purdue University—and Logansport, with two or three families. When I moved to California, I was the minority in my apartment building.
“Now I’ve been traveling extensively for the last eight years. I’ve been all over Asia and Eastern Europe. In November, I’m going on a trip across Russia.
“Some of the people around here have travelled in the U.S., but they have no desire to travel abroad. The first thing they ask me is, ‘Aren’t you afraid?’ Afraid of what? I’m more afraid in East L.A. than in any of the countries I’ve visited. Some of them never interact with people from other cultures, and I think that’s sad in a way because we’re all human beings.”
When you come out as trans, people sometimes take a while to adjust to your new pronouns, or don’t quite understand.
So we launched a new campaign to help! An article that introduces the topic, a video with a rundown from trans young people, and a web app where you can learn and practice pronouns!
Here’s our easy way to help your friends and family get your pronouns right and understand why it’s important.